Last summer, my then 14 year old King, obtained his first job. To say he was excited was an understatement.
My oldest son was scheduled to have a leg lengthening surgery and was at his pre-op appointment. He was anxious, nervous, asking a ZILLION QUESTIONS, and just being a pure pain in the butt. After listening to my son and I CALMLY go back and forth, the nurse replied, “You have a lot of patience.”
My prayers had been answered, all the tests I had been given, I finally passed.
Having children early, I feel the biggest hurdle for mom and child is the lack of experience with EVERYTHING, especially rearing a child.
While I was always very mature for my age, looking back at my mommy hood journey, I wish I was more patient.
I knew I didn’t have patience and prayed for it often. Someone once told me, “you are not given patience, but opportunities to practice.” My mom would always tell me to stop worrying about things that won’t “make or break you.” A little before my mom fell ill did this click!
Everything had to be in order, what they wore, how they looked, if it matched, cleanliness blah blah blah.
While these things are still important, the bar for the standards have been dropped so low, I think it’s just a pole on the floor!
I have 2 group of kids in my home.
The 2 that are old enough to know better, do better, and to an extent provide basic care (hygiene) for themselves.
The 2 that are my responsibility because they are too young to know better.
My oldest 2 have been lectured and taught about what and what not to do with their clothes and body. My SO and his mother go CRAZY when my kids leave the house with wrinkled clothes, short sleeve shirt (DEAD WINTER), unbrushed hair and teeth, mixed match socks (probably dirty), no coat (just a hoddie despite having several coats), and no hat (despite having several ). Not only do they do all of this, they give you a “WHAT?” expression on their face when questioned…Wheres’s your coat?..Did you brush your teeth?….Did you comb your hair….etc..etc, as if WE ARE CRAZY!
I just look at them and shake my head. My feathers don’t get ruffled ONE. BIT.
Unless we’re going somewhere important, I could give a RATS BEHIND what those knuckleheads look like. Anyone that knows me and who opinion matters, KNOW my kids have EVERYTHING they could possibly need, want, AND MORE to be presentable. So with the latest trends of not wearing a coat but just a hoodie going on, or wearing socks that don’t match, I don’t scream and holler at them. I simply take them somewhere COLD with their hoodie. While I have my coat, hat, scarf, gloves, and layered outfit…and take my bitter sweet time.
Or somewhere important like the doctor’s office so they’re most likely dirty mix-matched socks can be exposed! It cracks me up how they try to tuck their feet under the chair as if they’re….WAIT FOR IT…..EMBARRASSED!
My younger two I am responsible for, and unless a grandparent, or a father was in charge that day, they are always presentable. However, I know the day will come when they too will be taught subtle lessons as mentioned above. I just wonder what new subtle ways I will have come up with to teach them a lesson.
FREAKING AWESOME, GREAT, SUPER, SPLENDID, THE BESTEST (YES BESTEST) FAIRYTALE BOOK BROUGHT TO LIFE!!!
Listen people, if you haven’t seen this movie, YOU ARE MISSING OUT! I have NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, seen a book brought to life in this manner.
There was no detail spared with making this movie. The scenery, the props, the WARDROBE was to DIE FOR, and the ACTORS and ACTRESSES were FLAWLESS!
I was watching this movie as if I never read or of heard of Cinderella…that’s how engaging it was. I was captivated by every word they spoke and breath they took.
I know this movie was great because my 5-year-old who ALWAYS TALK DURING MOVIES, was speechless, tuned in, with her mouth gaped open.
Now let me get back to this wardrobe.. I love 19th century clothing style. It had so much character, detail, sexiness, and elegance. The velvets, the lace, the brass buttons, thin waistlines…I could go on and on! (clutches pearls and passes out)
It was said in an article written by the The Globe and Mail there were over 10,000 Swaroski crystals on the Cinderella dress! Bling Bling!
Lady Tremaine (the evil step-mother) her dresses were just FABULOUS, delicate lace, olive greens, bright yellows, fitted and trimmed, with hats and veils that would make a church woman lose her MIND!!!
Now the EYE CANDY! Woo-wee-BABY! Prince Charming was an absolute joy to watch…those, eyes, his frame, his voice, his passion…man oh man! He too looked awesome in his costumes! I never knew a man in tights could make my legs weak!
Even the foot men outfits were Stunning, the royal blue coats with the brass buttons, made me want a replica for my son to wear! I couldn’t find a picture of the coat, but go watch the movie and you’ll see for yourself!
Lastly the acting….was priceless. Whoever casted for this movie, deserves a raise! EVERYONE WAS STUPENDOUS! If I didn’t know any better, I would have thought Ella and the Prince were lovers in real life! They were beyond believable! Those two made that love story and fairytale ending THEIR OWN! I swear they had to have experienced that type of love drama in their life. They had me with every gasp they took when they touched, and the way they looked into each other’s eyes….pure storybook!
I definitely want this on DVD and NEED TO SEE it again in IMAX. If you don’t believe me about how awesome a movie this is, please go check it out!
Oh, and in no way was I compensated for writing this, these are TRULY my own opinions and feelings!
I read an article by a Stay At Home Mom (SAHM) that was shared over 11,000. In brief, she went on to say, she felt it wasn’t a job (as many SAHM claim), but a privilege. By definition, she is right, it’s not a job. While I didn’t really agree with her tone, choice of words and opinion of SAHM per say, I did understand what she was attempting to say.
I’m not an exclusive SAHM, I do work Saturday and Sunday as a RN 6 days a month. The rest of the days, I’m manning 4 of my off-spring. When I am working, and explain to my patients I only work Sat/Sun if they need to reach me…., they always ask, “YOU ONLY WORK 2 DAYS?!” I say, “Yes, I have 4 children, one of which is 1 year old that I stay home with during the week.”
IMMEDIATELY, almost everyone men included say, “OH, no wonder, you already have a full-time job!” My patient population is usually 65 and older, so they know the ins and out of what it takes rearing children.
I agree with them. What I do Monday-Friday is WAAAAAAAAAAY MORE “WORK” than what I get paid to do on the weekend. There are days I actually do look forward to going to work to get a “break”, and I like to consider this NORMAL.
However would I classify my role as a mother as a job, I would say no. For me, a job is not something permeant, its temporary work in which you get paid for. I like to look at being a mother as my CAREER.
I will have this role for the duration of my life, no matter where I go in life. It will always be with me. It was something I aspired to be, and I spend everyday of my life perfecting it. It’s rewarding and makes me feel like I have made a positive contribution to society at the end of everyday.
Having the privilege of being the main influence in my children’s lives is an honor everyone is not afforded in life, and for that I am grateful.
However, I always say being a mom is hard work, but striving to be the “Best Mom” you can be is by far the hardest thing I know I will ever do in my life. There are no manuals for raising kids through all the different developmental stages they go through. It’s a learn as you go role, with a little bit of advice from here, there, and past experiences. The more you do it the better you get (if you are striving to be better).
There are days where I wonder, “WHAT THE HECK WAS I THINKING HAVING FOUR KIDS?!” This is because being a mom you NEVER GET A BREAK mentally, physically or spiritually. Everyone knows what it feels like to work without having a vacation in a long while, and I’ll leave it at that.
Then there are moments like now, as I’m typing this, where my baby just comes over grabs my hand from the computer, wrap my arm around him, lay his head on my shoulder, leans over and gives me the biggest, “Mmmmm Muah!” That act of unconditional love takes my breath away. One moment like this makes every sacrifice worthwhile.
While in any given day I may be a:
4. Laundry manger
10. Wardrobe CEO
11. Personal Shopper
12. Hygiene Management and Inspector
15. Sports Practice Partner
17. School Project CEO
19. Event Planner Specialist (Birthdays, Vacations, Outings)
21. Mrs. Fix-It
23. Errand Runner
25. Child Care Provider
I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. This is a role I chose to take, and I plan to be the best at it. Despite what others may believe about SAHM or any mom , what we do is Priceless. Being responsible for a human being who came WITHOUT INSTRUCTIONS, WARNINGS, OR RETURN POLICY, and molding them into a functional productive member of society, is tough stuff.
I don’t know about other mothers but given the choice, I’d rather be the one waking my children up, taking them to school, being the one to pick them up and ask how their day was (while it’s fresh), eat dinner with, help with homework, take to practice, and tuck in at night. This to me is priceless and before you know it (so my patients tell me), they are grown living on their own.
NO ONE CAN TREAT A CHILD LIKE A MOTHER TREATS HER CHILD. NO ONE.
I’m convinced that I clean my house just to keep my house from looking like one of those houses off of hoarders!
Everyday, I get up in the mooring and move, pick-up, put-back, re-arrange etc the SAME ITEMS. Then on the weekends, I’m working and come Monday, I am now doing this for two missed days.
I literally cleaned the foyer while everyone was going, from having multiple pairs of shoes from 5 people, coats, scarves, hats, book-bags, sports equipment, basketballs, boxes from packages, and whatever misc stuff you can name, it probably was there. You know these BLEEP HOLES came in 10 minutes later and just kicked off shoes, dropped bags and coats in the floor, and the place darn near looked like it did before I started IN 2 MINUTES FLAT!!!!!
I wanted to throw EVERYTHING in the trash! To make matters worse, it seems as if EVERY TIME my MIL comes over, it’s on one of my IDGA… days. I know she thinks I never clean this place! She however, is so helpful and jumps right in cleaning, cooking, taking care of the Duke.
OR, I’ll clean the bathroom, and guess who ALL OF A SUDDEN NEEDS TO SHAVE??? No problem right? WRONG, when The Hubs shave, he has a terrible habit from childhood, of just leaving HAIR WHERE IT FALLS! His baby sister even has a sensitive spot about the bad habit.
I must mention, in no way am I a clean house SAINT, but I really feel like I could be doing a lot more with my hours that are going to be wasted in minutes.
I so look forward to the day when I clean my house from top to bottom and when I’m DONE, all the rooms preceding the last room I finished are STILL SOMEWHAT CLEAN.
The simple things in life we look forward to being mothers.
There are days, I wonder what the heck was I thinking having 4 kids. Why didn’t I stop at 2?! Shoot, why did I even start!
Especially when it’s something I want to do, but I can’t because of something I need to do for one of four that takes precedence.
For example: This summer I was suppose to go to Germany, but now The King needs a surgery that will take up the entire summer, so guess what…mom can’t go.
In no way do I regret my kids, or wish I didn’t have them. I’m just human and have moments where I wish it was just me. I like to believe this is normal, and any mom who never had a moment like this is LYING TO HERSELF!
Days when I clean the house, and turn around and it’s dirty all over again…wish I was kidless.
Times when I wash clothes for 6 and 2 days latter laundry baskets are filled AGAIN…wouldn’t have that problem if it was just me.
Moments when I want to just up and go and not have to worry about what time I need to be done or dragging a baby, diaper bag, and stroller with me.
How about just wanting to come home and relax…not have to worry about dinner, homework, dance, gymnastics, basketball, baseball, school functions etc. etc. etc.
Then I think, “My kids are who made me who I am today, and I am pretty darn proud and blessed.”
I remember going to a patient’s house and she was sitting on her porch just drinking coffee and looking out at her yard. I asked does she get bored. Her reply was priceless…
“Nurse, I’m 79 years old, I raised 5 kids, and helped with 13 grandchildren. I’ve waited a long time to do NOTHING.”
So with that, my inspiration came, one day, God willing, I will be able to do NOTHING.
My middle son is AMAZING!
He’s the best big brother any sibling could dream of (when you’re under 5)!
He’s the biggest helper a mom could ever ask for.
He is an extremely super duper athlete (that may be famous one day)
He does excellent in school and rarely gives me a problem.
He has the sweetest heart and is always thinking of others.
He has a great work ethics always willing to earn his keep.
With all these amazing qualities, and being such a low key dude, I feel I don’t focus on him enough because he’s SOO GOOD!
My oldest son and my 2 little ones DEMAND attention in some form or fashion. While my Prince, just go with the flow.
It has to suck to be the middle child. He never complains, never fuss, and never argues…he just goes with the flow.
He’s never offered “deals” like a Xbox One or a Playstation 4 if he gets A’s and B’s on his report card, because he always do.
There should be a middle child club, because I’m sure there are things they experience no one but them could ever understand
I love him so much, for being the one who help keep me sane. He will be rewarded in life!
This is a hot topic with much debate on both ends for and against.
Personally, I can never understand WHY other people feel so entitled to have ANY SAY in what a mother (or father) does or doesn’t do with THEIR CHILD.
Unless, I’m clearly hurting my child in any way that is against the law, please leave me be.
I breastfeed (bf) my Duke. He’s 18 months now. I feed him every and anywhere he NEEDS to be fed, just like any caring mother would.
What I can’t seem to grasp my finger on, is why STRANGERS feel they have some authority to tell me I should use a cover because THEY ARE OFFENDED OR DON’T WANT TO SEE “THAT”.
I have a solution to your problems STRANGER. You have a few options. Pick which ever suits your needs.
1. Take this blanket/cover and cover YOURSELF up while you eat, and you won’t have to see a thing.
2. DON’T LOOK!
3. Mind YOUR BUSINESS.
4. If you cover YOUR KID’S HEAD WHILE EATING….I’LL COVER MINE.
5. PAY MY BILLS before you feel you have the right to make request from me TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.
I think I’m going to make a card to pass out the next time someone stares or comments…
At 18 months, what could you possibly fail?!
According to The Duke’s father…a routine PHYSICAL! I had dad take him to his 18 month check up. He came home a little concerned and said, “I think my son failed his physical.”
I’m a veteran at physical appointments and was looking at him VERY CONFUSED…and asked what happened?
Heres the recap..
Dad: She asked if he could say at least 5-10 words?
Dad:I said, “uhhhhhh….no”
Me: YES HE CAN!
Dad:She asked if he could run.
Me: What did you say?
Me: YES HE CAN RUN!
Dad: It’s more of a fast walk in my opinion. Then she asked if he could walk up the steps holding my
Dad. I told her nope. He tries, but since he’s so short, he has to lift his leg to his face to do it.
Me: That should have been, yes, just because he’s short and its difficult is not a reason to say no.
Dad: Then she asked if he eats well.
Me: I know he flunked that questions, he barely eats anything except me!
Dad: She asked if he could feed himself with a spoon, and I said not really…he tries.
Me: Yes he can, you feed him once a week so of course you don’t know!
Dad: He also got a Hep B shot.
Me: Ummm, no that can’t be right he’s had all those shots are you sure?! (me paranoid)
Dad: That’s what they told me…let me check….(after reviewing the paperwork)…oh it was a Hep A.
Me: Did he gain any weight or grow? (my son is seriously underweight and under height).
Dad: Yeah he’s 19 inches and 19 pounds
Me: (SERIOUS CONFUSED FACE)….(go check online myself)…his head is 19, he’s 27.6 inches tall!
Me: You are so fired. I knew I should have taken him myself.
After that, I came to the conclusion, dad is off of doctor appointment duty. He made my baby look seriously delayed. I also learned moms and dads totally interpret those questions asked by the PCP differently. Afterwards all we could do was laugh.
All of a sudden out of NO WHERE, my baby boy has learned to throw a FULL BLOWN TANTRUM!
He literally throws himself back, bust his head on WHATEVER is in close proximity of his head. Next, he flip flops and rolls around on the floor like he is trying to put a fire out. Then the icing on the cake is the screaming bloody murder making my ear drums ring.
My tactic typically would be to ignore him, however, I’m afraid he’s going to hurt himself banging his head on everything. One night he threw himself off the bed and did a black flip on the floor. SCARING THE HOLY CRAP OUT OF ME! I just knew he had a spinal injury (4 kids later you’d think I’d be immune to this). One time while in the tub, he went into a fit and darn near drowned himself fighting me trying to save him.
This type of nonsense is totally new to me. I NEVER experienced this with my other three to this degree. I feel like buying him a helmet and letting him go for it!
However I have come up with another plan.
1. For safety, I immediately grab him and place in his crib or bouncer chair for safety…he can only do but so much damage to himself.
2. I never say one word to him while he is going through his motions and I’m transporting him to his safe haven.
3. Once he is in his safe location, I tell him when he is done crying I will come back and get him and we can play or read a book.
4. Once he stops crying, I go get him and thank him for calming down.
I just started this process and hope after a few rounds he gets the point, because I REFUSE to be THAT PARENT out in public with THAT CHILD for a LONG TIME!
Let’s face it, we all get a dose of embarrassment with toddlers!